Do your interactions at work reflect the real you?
I once ran into a man I worked with at a small train station near my home. There was a real conductor, a caboose and the whole experience of trains from an earlier time. The man was with his children. He was gentle, his face was soft, he smiled and asked how I was and how I was enjoying the day. I’ll never forget the feeling of experiencing him in that way for the first time after working with him for more than a year. At work he rarely smiled. He never asked questions, his face was set and firm and he got away from a situation when there was interaction going on as fast as his feet could carry him.
 |
Christie and her daughter Tori in
Paris this last summer. |
One evening as I was leaving work, I ran into a colleague in the hallway. She was dressed in an exercise leotard and colorful jacket and shorts. She was literally bouncing down the hallway on the way to the elevator, humming some music to herself. She let me know, after I asked, that she was on her way to teach an aerobics class at another company and that she roved around to different companies teaching aerobics every week. At work she was quiet, dressed in gray and browns, baked cookies occasionally and otherwise just did her work with laser like precision. I was trying to imagine her leading a class of people dancing to music and giving loud and energetic instructions.
Why did she seem so completely different at work? What had she learned or decided that said the part of her that was an enthusiastic, inspiring leader and creatively dressed person should not show up to work? Did someone tell her that colorful creative clothes and her enthusiasm for exercise should be kept quiet?
What about the man? Did he think that his gentle and endearing qualities were best left just for his family and friends?
In both these cases these individuals could have contributed even more to a positive work culture by bringing all of who they are to the experience. When someone shares their interests and passions with another, each is given permission to more fully express who they are. Knowing each other better engenders trust and a willingness to share more insight, wisdom and even concerns. When there are difficult problems on a project, individuals are more likely to roll up their sleeves with someone that they ‘know’ rather than someone they work with. When there is a conflict people are more invested in working it out with people that they ‘know’ rather than just someone they work with.
 |
Do you Tango? Does anyone know? |
When I have heard people talk about leaders that they have worked with that they greatly admire, they never just talk about them professionally. They talk about what a great dad, little league coach, singer, story teller, comic or artist they were in addition to their work. They are inspired by the total person and not just their knowledge.
Are you willing to be known at work? How might things change if you were?
|
